Part one of this four part series on how to cope with the holiday blues provided a definition of the holiday blues and coping strategies for the emotional aspect of your life. Part two provides a brief overview of the definition and coping strategies in the social and family areas of your life.
What is the holiday blues?
The holiday blues is feelings of disappointment, sadness, stress and being overwhelmed related to holiday experiences. These feelings are triggered at this time of the year when longing for loved ones increases, when yearning for the way things use to be increases, when unrealistic expectations take over, when isolation from family and friends seems like a good coping strategy, and when the pressure to feel merry becomes too much.
Social
Don't Isolate. Isolation increases feelings of loneliness, hopelessness and helplessness. Maintain your regular work and leisure schedule as much as possible. Accept invitations to spend time with family and friends.
Volunteer. In the spirit of good will toward others get involved with a volunteer activity. Check with local churches, food banks, soup kitchens, and youth organizations to see how they can benefit from your knowledge, skills and abilities.
Do something for someone. Take the focus off yourself. It always feels good to help others.
Enjoy free activities. Check with local community and recreation centers, churches and shopping malls for a schedule of free activities.
Spend time with people you care about. Accept invitations, give invitations. Don't allow your negative symptoms to drive your behavior and perhaps drive away friends and family.
Reach out to lost friends and family. Send a holiday card with a hand written note, make a phone call, send an e-mail, search Facebook. What ever the reason the relationship has grown apart probably isn't still relevant or meaningful. Put those long-forgotten reasons aside and rekindle that relationship.
Adopt a pet. Pets provide a lifetime of fun, laughs and companionship. Be realistic about the type of pet that's right for you. Think beyond cats and dogs. Consider hamsters, guinea pigs, and birds.
Join a "Meet Up" group. Check out www.meetup.com and search for leisure activities in your area. There are Meet Up groups for everything from book clubs to bloggers to camping. The people are generally nice and welcoming and willing to share their knowledge and expertise. Most activities are free or low cost.
Family
Invite family to your home. Be realistic about the type of event you have. Is the thought of a huge family dinner too much to contemplate? Then mix things up a bit. For example, if you have several adult children and they all have families of their own consider inviting each family to your home individually during the course of the holiday season. Invite them for an event that has fewer implied expectations such as lunch or breakfast, or tea and cookies, or a movie and popcorn. Smaller gatherings with fewer expectations reduce the stress of preparing for a large crowd and gives you something to look forward to throughout the season.
Invent new family traditions. This will help decrease longing for missing loved ones. Instead of being sad that grandma is no longer alive to bake her famous red velvet cake begin a tradition of baking red velvet cupcakes with the children in the family. This creates a new tradition but honors grandma as well.
Creatively honor lost loved ones. "Lost loved ones" does not simply refer to those who have passed but can also refer to those who are deployed with the military, or live in a different state. Send care packages, video tape activities and events, communicate via Skype. To honor those who have passed have a special meal, or a moment of silence or visit a place the person enjoyed.
Reminisce about loved ones and holidays past. Pull out old pictures and videos, put on the old records and do those old dances. Remember the fun and good times; don't dwell on the loss or the past or the way things use to be.
Being involved with others during the holiday is important for many reasons including not isolating yourself, giving to others and building or maintaining relationships. Social time and family time are one of the biggest aspects of the holiday season. While they are important aspects don't over do it. Part three of this series provides coping strategies in the areas of physical activity and finances.
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